So You think You Can Live Without This...

Here's one for you. Just how in the heck are you going to survive without Mr. Franklin's discovery - Electricity? Got that one figured out yet? Well, if WWIV ever comes a callin', you had better.

Life Without Power

Oh, this is going to suck, my friends. 

Let's take a peek at something most of us use every single day. A device that has made modern people's lives much simpler. The refrigerator.

If, like I write about in my WWIV series, one day our electricity disappears, your poor "ice box" ain't gonna work no more. Yikes; better open it sparingly, right? Ha! Better eat what's in there as fast as you can before it all spoils (and when your food does go bad - never open the door again).

What about air conditioning, heat, toasters, coffee makers? Nope, none will work any longer.

Hair dryers, televisions, radios, printers, garage door openers...will they survive? Absolutely not.

Please, you beg; please tell me my computer will work. Or at least my cell phone or my iPod? Sorry. All gone. Each and every one of them. Along with anything else powered (or charged) by electricity.

Can you say early 1800s?

And it continues to get worse.

All those fancy machines and gadgets in our hospitals will also be rendered useless. Further, without the power of electricity how are factories supposed to work? They can't, quite simply.

That means no more food production, medicine production, even toilet paper production.

Schools will close, people will die in nursing homes in rapid order. Gas can't be pumped any longer, so your car becomes worthless. And whatever's in the ground is all we are going to have for the rest of time. Because, and this is how bad The Darkness will be, none of it is ever coming back. Not for centuries to come.

So maybe we should look at the 1600s

I realize all of this is impossible to believe, improbable to comprehend, and unlikely to ever occur (at least you hope it doesn't), but what if it did. What if all the preppers and survivalists were right? 

What exactly are you going to do then? That's the ten-million dollar question.

No, I can't ever imagine the end of the world like portrayed in my novels - they're fiction after all.

Right?

Until next week, let me know what you'll miss most about electricity in the comment section below. I'll be waiting for your replies.

e a lake

(books below are interactive, so go ahead and click on any of them)

                       

The Dreaded Semicolon; or in my case, The Semicolon, man's greatest invention

Truth be known, I actually know how to properly use a semicolon. But...that doesn't mean I use it correctly as I create.

The semicolon is a punctuation mark used to connect to thoughts of a similar nature. At least that's how I define it. But according to another source, Wikipedia, it is defined as such:

A semicolon can be used between two closely related independent clauses, provided they are not already joined by a coordinating conjunction.

Yeah, okay, I get it. Let's agree that thoughts equal independent clauses. And I guess I left out that conjunction thingy. But, all in all, my definition pretty much matches the given definition pretty darn close. Don't you agree?

Here's the thing: When I am creating a rough draft of any manuscript, my mind is going six thousand miles a minute. Typically, I'm a sentence or two ahead of any given point I might be writing. I'm thinking of the next paragraph of narration, or perhaps some snappy dialogue. When it comes times for proper punctuation, I'm like a prize fighter moving in for the kill. Be gone training and technique; away with any sage-like advice. Let's get this over with!

So, I end up with sentences like this:

As he was about to turn back to her, a speck appeared in the sky; far away and falling swiftly to earth. (This line is from my soon to be released novella: WWIV - Darkness Descends.)

Once an editor gets their hands on my material, they love to add a comment just like this: "You are using the punctuation mark, the semicolon as a comma. When you use a semicolon, there needs to be a complete sentence after the mark" (actual wording from the editor of the rough draft).

Yeah, I know. These two thoughts in the sentence are not independent. I've been told this same advice many times over already. In book one and two of the WWIV series, my main editor, Rob Bignell, might have noted this one hundred times. By the tenth time, I think he just took to changing the semicolon into a comma. He's a smart guy.

Here's one that I caught using Grammarly, an Online Grammar checker:

Kate was absent; and that left just the Little Queen and Mara to listen to Raison. 

I most likely would have caught this error in the proofreading stage. This one would have never been seen by an editor. At least that's what I'm telling myself right now. 

With a conjunction in the sentence (and), a semicolon should never see the light of day. But there it was; no sense in denying it. And doesn't even sound correct if I change the semicolon to a comma. In this case, I simply removed the word "and" to make wise use of the punctuation.

Kate was absent; that left just the Little Queen and Mara to listen to Raison. 

Now that I study that sentence closer, there has to be a better way of saying what it is I mean to get across. I think I'll just scratch that one from my rough draft entirely.

Even though I am fast approaching the one million-word mark in my writing career, anyone can plainly see that I have a ways to go before becoming proficient at this trade. With that in mind, I will set out this year to become better at:

1. Using funky punctuation such as the semicolon and the em-dash (--).
2. Learn the proper use of gerunds (was running, were coming). Something to do with cleaning up my tendency to slip into the passive voice, from time to time.
3. Listen to my editors carefully, and depend on these professionals to clean up where I may still fall short.


I am not perfect at anything, much less writing. But this year I will strive to become the best I can; so help me George Orwell. (You can check me on this, but I think I used the semicolon properly in the preceding sentence - there may be hope for me yet)!


Until next week, stay warm everyone!




e a lake

My Books:

                        

Just say NO! to profanity

Let's start with football

Late last fall, I watched the Packers hammer the Pats in Green Bay. I watched it on TV, I should add, not in person. I already live in a cold climate, I know what cold feels like. I don't have to go out to enjoy freezing.

Anyway, Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers faced off on the frozen tundra. The game was an instant classic, maybe. I hate the Pats, and equally hate the Pack. So I was sort of cheering for the end of the world while the game was on; that way they'd both lose.

After one fruitless series, I watched as Tom Brady trotted to the sidelines and let out a string of profanity that even my three-year-old granddaughter could have lip-read. One of the announcers said something like, "That Brady, he's such a competitor." The other mindless boob in the booth chimed in, "Sometimes you just got to get it out and move on."

Really? That's our attitude to open profanity now? Watched by 20 million people. Really?

Later that night I watched the Broncos and the Chiefs. I like the Broncos; I really like Peyton Manning. He's a classy guy.

So Manning trots off one time, after missing a wide open Wes Welker, and shakes his head. As lips parted, I carefully watched for his silent words (thank God they don't have a ton of open mikes on the sidelines). And then the frustration boiled over and Peyton let it fly.

"Dang it," he chided himself. "Dang it!"

Now, let's talk about writing

I know some of you are clever and like to use lots of large, complex words. Some even go as far to fill pages with similes and metaphors. Sentences have perfect construction; paragraphs fly by with seemingly no effort. All is well in your writing.

So explain this to me, as if I were a simpleton: Why do you feel the need to fill your dialog with profanity? Really, I'm dying to know.

I've been told there are good reasons for the use of these kinds of words, sparingly though. Certainly not in every other line. Here's a few of the good ones:

1. Profanity is the language of the real person. Really? You think the Barack Obama uses a lot of cussing throughout the day? I don't. I've heard my mother swear once in her life; sadly in reference to me. Something, I did, made an "ass" of myself. That's it; her big use of profanity, saved up for a one-time use on me - for effect.

2. Profanity makes your writing real. NO! It actual cheapens your writing. You couldn't be any more clever than to spit out a disgusting word that is typically reserved for rap songs and trailer park conversations? And you think that's real? Tell me, how stupid does that sound!

3. The big authors do it, so should we. I know several who use profanity in their writing. Mostly, they use it sparingly, certainly not every page. But here's the rub: They are huge authors, with followings in the millions. You (we) are Joe (or Josette) Schmo; following in the dozens.

Early on in my writing career I read several articles on this touchy subject. The articles all said the same thing: You risk cutting your readership by more than half with the continued use of harsh language. That made me sit up and really think. The occasional "damn" or "hell" is forgiven. Even the once in a while "shit" can fly under the radar. But start dropping f-bombs and people will take notice - and not in a good way.

In 2016, I will introduce you to a character with a military background. In his particular branch of service, the f-word is used as a noun, an adjective, a verb, and so on. Yet, in the almost 650,000 words I plan for the four-book set, not once will he use something as crude as an f-bomb.

Mind you, I'm surrounding him with a family of younger ladies. And one of these young women is on him all the time about his salty language. "Really, Mr. Smith. Must you be so crude?" And that follows him telling her to "mind her own damn business." There are plenty of other ways to get his hardened personality across. I chose from the onset to portray John Smith's crustiness to my readers without resorting to long tirades of profanity.

In the end, it's your choice

So choose wisely, please.


Until next week, enjoy life through the eyes of another... in a book.


lake

My Books:

                        

Choose Your Words, and Commas, Wisely

Let's look at a few sentences so we can see what happens when grammar and punctuation are abused.

Let's eat Grandma.

I must admit, this is one of my all-time favorites. We assume that you are calling grandma for lunch or dinner here. Like she's in her room, or favorite chair, taking a nap. But that's not what this sentence really states.

In the sentence above, I can only decipher that grandma is dead, and we are going to have her for supper. What? You ask, reading the line again. Yes, I tell you emphatically, that is the true meaning of that sentence.

Perhaps you meant this instead:

Let's eat, Grandma.

Now that sentence gets across the first idea and leaves no room for doubt as to what you were trying to say. That was fun, let's do another.

Your donation just helped someone. Get a job.

Believe it or not, this comes from a sign at a charitable organization. I saw the sign myself. I'd really like to meet the person who wrote and designed this one. Or even the proofer who gave the go ahead to have these signs made up.

Here the sign offers two thoughts, one intended and the other - well, not so much. My donation helped someone. That's good to know. It makes me feel better when I drop off ten pairs of pants that are almost brand new and don't fit any longer (weight loss, not gain, in my case). I can already envision a man, down on his luck, gleefully pulling on a pair of work-causal khakis.

The second part of the statement (after the period), reminds me to go out and get a job. At the very least, it is reminding someone to get a job (I have two, thank you).

I bet they meant for the sign to read like this:

Your donation just helped someone get a job.

At least I hope that's what they meant. The original version is otherwise slightly rude I'm afraid.

One more before we close for the week.

Cam and Mitchell are competent, loving parents, both are lawyers.

Okay, first off if we are speaking of the two characters on Modern Family, they are not both lawyers. Only Mitchell works in law; Cam is a stay at home dad who does some "clowning" on the side. Glad to get that straightened out up front.

Next, I have no idea what the above sentence is trying to tell me. Are they competent men, loving parents, and lawyers? Perhaps they're competent, loving parents first; and lawyers second. Or maybe they are competent lawyers and loving parents. It's all messed up in my mind.

If I was going to rewrite this sentence, this is what I'd most likely do:

Cam and Mitchell are both competent, loving parents, and lawyers.

I might take the word "both" out of the sentence completely. I think it only adds confusion to the statement.

By the way, it's a good thing I didn't mess up the title of this post. It would have been embarrassing to see it in this form:

Choose Your Words and Comas, Wisely

That's just all kind of wrong and on so many different levels.


Have a great week. In the last month, I've reread The Jungle, by Upton Sinclair and Catch-22, by Joseph Heller. If you haven't read either, I highly recommend them for a great read.


e a lake

My Books:

                        

The Year in Review - 2014

As many of you know, 2014 was my first year in the writing/author/novel game. Looking back twelve months, I can't honestly tell you what I thought 2014 would bring. But, I can say now that this past year has been fruitful beyond any of my wildest dreams.

Book Sales

In 2014, I managed to sell almost 4,000 copies of two books: WWIV - In The Beginning, and, WWIV - Kids at War. Not bad for a rookie. In dollars, I grossed slightly more than $6,000 from these sales. Again, I'm happy with this result.

What did I expect going into this business? I actually have no idea. I'm a planner, a financial guy, so I should have had some sort of budget figured out beforehand. But the cold truth is, I didn't. I just wanted to sell some books in 2014. Honestly, I can't tell you if that meant 30 copies, 300 copies, or almost 4,000 copies.

I do know this, though: my plan would have been much closer to 300 (one book per day) than 3,000.

For 2015, I'd like to raise my gross sales number to $15,000. To do this, I plan on releasing three more novels (actually two novels and a novella). Total book sales, in units, will reach approximately 9,000, perhaps as high as 10,000. At least these are my goals.


P&L for the Year

Somehow, against the usual odds a first-time writer faces, I made money in this venture last year. While I'm still compiling the final numbers, I believe my expenses, all told, were somewhere around $3,600. That means I made about $2,400 at this business.

The two categories where I spent the most money were editing ($1150) and advertising ($750). The editing expense is necessary in my mind. The first book had one edit, book two had three edits. Most books going forward will have three edits. The way I see it, it's better to have a good product than a cheap product. There are still some errors I find that need fixing. But overall, I want to present a decent product first and foremost.

Advertising money in 2014 was mostly thrown to the wind. I didn't really have a plan, so I had no roadmap to follow. I did a little of this and that, but mostly very little as far as well-planned advertising. I need to do a much better job of this in 2015.


Blogging

In 2014, I posted 65 posts that were visited some 3,600 times. That's an average of 360 visits per month (I began blogging in late February).

I'd like to have better reach in 2015. Perhaps increase my visits to 500 per month. That will give my 52 posts in 2015 some 115 views each week. I realize in 2014 a number of views were bot driven; so if I can, I'd like my 2015 numbers to be real people visiting.

I would also like the content of my blog to be more consistent, more about this writing life I have chosen. While, for the most part, I stuck to that in 2014, 2015 needs better focus on my part.


Website

I have a website. Occasionally, like two or three times daily, that site receives visits. But that's where it ends for me.

My website is a disaster; and absolute colossal failure on my part. I'd invite you to visit the abyss, but it wouldn't be worth your time.

The only improvements I made last year to my site was occasionally updating my 2014 reading list. I need to, I must, do a better job of making this site usable and relevant.


Writing Projects

I created three manuscripts this past year. Books three and four of my WWIV series, and a prequel that will be released soon (and given away for free).

Proofing, editing, rewriting and such took up more time than I had planned in 2014. I can't tell you how many times I read and reread my first two novels last year. I know it was at least a dozen times each. Also, I format my own manuscripts; both for e-books and paperback. You want a time-sucker? Formatting! But I did it and I'm proud of my accomplishments.

Between the small amount of research and marketing, I seem to waste time on, I manage to rob myself of what could otherwise be productive, creative hours. I have so many ideas for new novels. And most of them are just swirling around in my brain, laid down on paper nowhere. I need to do better and create more content. What I really need is a time machine so my days have 50 hours each.

In 2015, I will finish my WWIV series. The last book most likely will not be published until 2016, but I may get it out yet this year. 2016 will also bring the release of book one in my epic series, The Smith Chronicles. I need to spend some time this year being sure that book one, Golden 5, is ready for beta reading later in the year.


There it is, my 2014 raw data and 2015 projections. A person without a plan can never fail, nor succeed. So I challenge all of you, writings and readers, to make some plans for 2015. And maybe even make them public; hold yourself accountable. Develop a plan and work it to fruition.


e a lake

My Books:

                        

Five Mistakes budding authors make

Now that I've been a writer for almost two years, I'm starting to get the hang of things. Anyone more than a couple years in knows what I mean. At first, everything is terrible...and you have no idea why. But after almost 750,000 words put down on page, some of this begins to make sense.

After going back and reading some of my early creations, I began to notice the constant mistakes I made. Two years later, I've beta read a lot (and I mean a lot) of new authors work. Guess what? Many of them made the same mistakes as I. Let's investigate some.

1. We use too many adverbs

Actually, we new writers seem to be in love with adverbs. Quickly, rapidly, gruffly, shyly. And most of the time, they made sense...at the time. Consider this:

"I just don't know anymore," Charlotte added shyly.

Okay, that makes my stomach turn when I look at it now. Before, it was beautiful prose; a penned masterpiece worthy of high praise and laurels.

Charlotte peeked at me, her brown eyes barely visible through her long lashes. "I just don't know anymore," she added, letting her eyes return to her quivering hands.

Aside from removing the adverb, the sentence has also become much more active. Here we let her actions tell us of her shyness, her uneasiness with the subject. Before, well it was just blah.

Steven King says kill all adverbs; I tend to agree. If you search your manuscript for every one of these buggers and strike them away, you'll still have plenty left that you've missed. Adverbs, it seems, are perceived to be lazy writing. And I really can't argue with that statement.

2. We tell instead of show

I have a confession for you; at first, I had no idea what this phrase meant. If I wrote, Jim was mad, I believed that conveyed everything the reader needed to know. And to be honest, if you don't have a problem hanging with the B and C level writers, it's fine. But we're missing something if we accept the prior sentence as prose.

The young writer often misses the opportunity to use any of the five senses most, if not all, human beings possess. Let's revisit - Jim was mad.

Sight - I bet his face reddened, or his lips tightened, or his fists clenched by his side.

Sound - Maybe he snorted, perhaps his breathing became labored - audibly.

Smell - We can use this to contrast Jim's foul mood. The scent of lily's dissipated as Jim's anger rose.

Touch - I reach for Jim's arm and feel it tense. Or perhaps he jerks away.

Taste - I'd really have to reach to use this sense in describing Jim's mood. And chances are I would blow it, badly.

Not every situation can be told via all five senses, but the crafty writer includes them here and there to draw their readers into his or her story. When done well, the reader becomes part of the tale; as if they are standing amidst the characters, involved in their interaction.

3. The NSV Issue

Let me ask the world a question: Who told you to write all of your sentences in the same order and all the time?

Dick ran fast. Jane ran faster. Spot crapped on the carpet.

Noun, subject, verb... BORING!

Mix things up; don't copy, paste repeat. And while we're at it, please vary the length of sentences and paragraphs. If everything looks and sounds the same  line after line, page after page - we loose our readers shortly after mid-first chapter.

4. Dialog Tags

We put them in the wrong places, we misuse words we believe are tags, and we love to help them with an adverb (see mistake #1 again).

I read a manuscript last year where all of the dialog tags preceded the dialog.

Joanie said, "We don't have much time, Robert."

I had never seen this before. Wait, check that; I've seen this before, but rarely. I'd never read an entire book, novel, or manuscript when the tags came before the dialog. I still don't think it's correct, but I believe that's just a style issue for me; not a hard and fast rule.

"Better hurry up, we don't want to be late," Betty sang.

Yeah, about that. Unless Betty put the words to a melody, I don't believe "sang" should be used as a dialog tag.

"I just don't know any more," Charlotte added shyly.

Again, this is from mistake #1. Don't do it, please!

Some will tell you the only two dialog tags to ever be used are "said" and "asked". After all, most people don't even read the tags. So what's the point in singing or chuckling or spitting words at one another.

5. We forget the plot of our own creation

I'm guilty of this myself. Sometimes I get all caught up in action and dialog and forget to advance the plot. After writing a sentence (okay, perhaps a paragraph) ask yourself this:

How do the preceding words move the plot forward?

At times, my best stuff gets chopped because it doesn't meet the plot test. Great dialog and interaction - gone because all I'd created was fluff. If you take it out (sentence, paragraph, even a whole chapter) and it doesn't change the story and won't be missed, you've created mere fluff. Just something nice, in your mind, that shows this or that about a character or setting.

Steven King says, "A proper second draft, is the first draft minus 10 percent."

Ernest Hemingway once wrote, "The first draft of anything is shit."

So there, even the masters realize that not everything one pens will make the final cut. Look for your plot holes. Be stringent in recognizing writing the adds little to the story. The story, after all, is everything. The fluff we tend to create - sometimes just to add to the word count - needs to go.


There you have it; my top five mistakes from the first two years of writing. Remember, I'm guilty of all above. If you're honest with yourself, and please be, you'll agree with most.


Until next time, enjoy the holiday season. Even if it's not your holiday. Take time during the soon arriving longest night of the year to start reading the classic tale you've always wanted to.


lake